Stuck In A Hole

I’m struggling to find you who I cannot see
I’m struggling to find you who I cannot hear
I see things that I couldn’t see before
I hear things that I couldn’t hear before.

Yeah, that is in the lyrics in Miracles in December. Though, that is not the topic of this blog post

but it is rather related to it. The lyrics express what I'm feeling now that my older sister have finally graduated

and will be moving out because she's going to be college. though, i'm happy for her, i can't ignore the anxiety

and the feeling of being scared. It seriously sucks.

She is the only person I feel really close with (in my family) and knowing that she will have

to go miles away makes my stomach churn upside down and cringe.

It feels like losing a big part of me.

We have never been the closest pair of siblings, we just recently

getting there, warming up to each other because we always argue and fight

back then. And it hurts knowing I can never rewind time.

I open this book of memories and I open up your page

And in the book I’m in there, in there with you

sorry i just have to let this out 

because i don't know anyone

who I can pour out my thoughts to.