That Feeling.

I had promised myself a while back that I wouldn't chase her anymore. That I would move on. That I would attempt, to the best of my ability, to let her go and be happy with whomever she wanted to be with.

Tonight was that night. Besides the fact that the new GNB building was finally up and that this building was the greatest achievement of my entire life, something still didn't feel right as Ranjit drove me to the masterpiece. Something lingered in the air, and it wasn't Ranjit's interesting rendition of Jingle Bell Rock. No, it was something else, something that I honestly didn't know how to describe.

And while we drove through the somewhat picturesque New York skyline, I began to think a bit more than usual. The wrinkles on my forehead became evidently clear as worried thoughts rushed through my mind. My heart beated faster, imagining Robin's anxious but beautiful face waiting for the elevator to go to her destination. How nervous she felt. How wrong she must have felt to interrupt somebody's engagement like it was nothing. Even if she absolutely hated Patrice and pushed her into that pit, she still had a semblance of a conscience, unlike Barney.

Barney...I don't even know this guy anymore. Asking to marry Patrice, burning that Playbook and...how is he going to handle the fact that Robin loves him? Does he even care if he breaks her heart? God, I--

"Is something bothering you?" Ranjit peered through the rearview mirror, his eyebrow arching. I shook my head, and, with no regard for my possibly conflicted feelings whatsoever, Ranjit halted to a stop in the middle of the road, recieving a hell lot of honks from irritated drivers. I swore to God I nearly crapped in my pants while I clutched my chest, scared out of my wits.

"What the hell! You could've--"

"Why did you let Robin go?" he asked bluntly through all of the ridiculous honking. I unconciously ignored it because, I, Ted Mosby, was much more concerned about being shot for starting Traffic Hell. 

"Ranjit, you need to move!" I hollered, anxiously looking at the road block that we created. He refused to move and even turned off the car engine to prove some kind of point. The color flushed from my face as I muttered several curse words, pleading him to move. But it was to no avail. He was stubborn to find the answer, an answer that I perhaps didn't want to admit. An answer that I chose not to admit because I knew that if I did accept it, things would not move forward. I wouldn't be able to move forward.

"Tell me why you chose to let Robin be with Barney and I'll move."

Tell you why. I let her go because I knew that she wasn't the one for me, but for Barney. I wanted...I wanted...

"Because I want them to be happy?" I answered with an inquiring tone, my voice being a tad higher than usual. "Can we move now?'

"NO."

I groaned, stretching my arms out to the steering wheel, but his enormous body blocked my advances, still bombarding me with personal and painful questions. Frankly, I didn't want to talk about it. Just thinking about the situation and Robin and Barney was getting too much. To even think of Robin's face in tears...

Then, lo behold, a man with overloaded truck began to throw colorful and sparkly Christmas ornaments at our vehicle. Every crash and burst frightened me and, in desperation, I flung my body further out, exposing my beloved bum to the man, which only infuritated him even more.

"MOVE, BITCH."

The glass cracked. Out of sheer horror, Ranjit finally turned on the engine and moved away from the area and peace was restored once more. 

We both got a text from Robin. She's engaged to Barney. Apparently, he did this whole thing for her.

"Wow. So he did love her," I whispered to myself. For some odd reason, I felt that feeling again. This time I could describe it. It was ornery, conflicted...even--

You regret it, don't you? Because it's not you. Because you weren't the one that made her happy.

This time, Ranjit didn't butt into my life. This time, the voice in my head did it. My stupid selflish self. The ass that couldn't let her go no matter how hard he tried. 

And this time, I can admit it. I can admit that I'm all of those. 

But nothing can change. I can try to steal her from him, but what for? To prove that I'm a man?

No. Hell no. I'm done with that. I'm done with being selfish. No more of that Ted Mosby. From this point on, I move on. Congrats to Barney and Robin. I wish nothing but happiness for them.

But why...why do I still feel this way? 

This is way too short. ;___; But this is how I feel about the whole Barney/Robin thing. I don't know. Maybe it's because I want Ted to be happy, not to mope around and be like, "ANOTHER WOMAN THAT COULD'VE BEEN YOUR MOTHER."

I really want Robin to be their mother. ;___;