1 The Screwball Seven ★

Characters

Ryan Breland, Olivier Vasser, Roman Harper, Oscar Winham, Aaron Hart, Ariella Goldstein, Danika Rae, Thomas Harvey, Yasir Lakhani + More [Minor]

Description

What do a woman on the run from her mobster fiancé, a dysfunctional actor, a bank robber, a French tourist, a drug dealer, a school bus driver, and a mortician have in common?

After a strew of comedic and life-threatening incidents that span a couple of weeks, their faces are plastered on the front page of several State newspapers, and they’re in jail.

The Screwball Seven
If life gives you lemons, make petrol bombs and make people wonder how you did it.

Theme Song
Raise Your Glass - Pink
&
High School Never Ends - Bowling For Soup

Genre
Comedy, Crime, Soul-Searching, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort

Series
Original

Characters
Ariella Goldstein, Danika Rae, Ryan Breland, Oscar Winham, Roman Harper, Olivier Vasser, Aaron Hart, Thomas Harvey, Yasir Lakhani + Others, Minor.

Start Date
30 April 2016

End Date
--/--/--
 

Warnings
Swearing, Alcohol/Drug Abuse, Violence, Sexual Themes, Organized Crime, Mental/Physical/Emotional/Sexual Abuse

Foreword

 
[In Order of Appearance]



Ryan Breland
Til I Collapse - Eminem
“I’ve fought for my country, and now they’re hunting me. If they wanted to catch me, maybe they shouldn’t have trained me so well.”



Olivier Vasser
I Predict A Riot - Kaiser Chiefs
“What is happening here is a witch-hunt, and there is nothing any of you have to give which will make me go happily to an American prison. So I say this: what d we do now?”



Roman Harper
Supreme - Robbie Williams
“Maybe what the newspapers say are true: maybe we are all despicable vagrants. Maybe be we have broke the law. What I won’t have is being burnt at the stake for a crime I did not commit.”



Oscar Winham
Been To Hell - Hollywood Undead
“You’re like a car wreck. I know I should carry on with my own life - But I just can’t seem to look away.”



Aaron Hart
Teenagers - My Chemical Romance
“Compared to the rest of you, I am sound when it comes to relationships. I mean, look at you lot: I practically have a Freud-slash-Dr Seuss book riding on my backseat.”



Ariella Goldstein
New Americana - Halsey
I will only tell it to you once, so listen up. I’m not some weakling waiting to be saved, and I’m definitely not a damsel in distress.”



Danika Rae
I’m Not A Vampire - Falling in Reverse
“You found me bloody in the ghetto with a tire iron in my hand. You have no idea what kind of person I am so don’t fuckin’ press me, you fuckin’ cunt.”



Thomas Harvey
Fat Lip  -Sum 41
“Oh, don’t worry about it, Sugar-Tits, I’m used to the backwards thought of crooks. How about you try turning around and sticking your ass out - ‘cause you’re about to be fucked.”



Yasin Lakhani
Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand
“Excuse me for the interruption, but I think you’re out of your bloody mind. If you think between our skill sets we can outrun police dogs, gangsters, drug lords, and of course, who can forget the newest addition to our ever growing list of problems: a cop who hates cops, but likes to torment us just a little bit more, then you need medical help I cannot give.”