Sunsets with my Brother

My body slightly jerked forward as the car rolled to a stop. Slowly opening my heavy lids, I tried to make out my surroundings. The door  opened, and my eyes squinted at the sudden brightness inside the car.

“We’re here,” dad said looking at me through the rear view mirror as if he read what was on my mind.

“Umm,” I hummed in reply before releasing a yawn. Stretching my arms and legs, I accidentally hit something, rather, someone. I turned to my side and saw that my brother was still sleeping, his head leaning against the tinted window.

“Niichan,” I gently tapped his arm but based from experience, it would take more than that to wake him up.

“Niichan!” I raised my volume, shaking him as strong as I could but nothing happened.

“Niichan!! Wake up! Wake up! We’re at the beach!!” I chanted loudly, jumping over his lap until I caught him trying to stifle his laughter. It didn’t take long before he finally released it.

“Niichan!” I hit whatever part my hands landed, glaring at him while he just continued to laugh at me.

“Okay, okay. I surrender,” he raised his arms still chuckling. “I’m sorry,” he said softly and how could I not forgive him with those gentle eyes looking back at me? I sighed in defeat and moved towards the door when I felt his strong arms grab me.

“AHHH! Let go! Let go of me!” my older brother trapped me once again in one of his suffocating hugs. “Niichan!!” I retaliated but he just giggled, comfortably resting his chin on top of my head.

After a few more struggles, he finally released me and left me in the car gasping for air. I could never understand him. He could be very annoying, then be the kind brother the moment I get upset and after I have forgiven him, he will turn back to his silly self. Even so, I could never hate him. He is the only brother I have.

After helping out mom and dad in moving our things to the beach house, my brother and I raced to the shore, just like every summer ever since I started to walk on my own. And as always, he would let me win. This would be my sixth winning streak.

We dipped our feet in the water and I shivered at the sudden coolness that rushed through my body. I still haven’t recovered from the change in temperature when my niichan started splashing water at me.

“Ahh, Shiro-nii!” I shielded my body with my arms as if it would protect me from his water attacks. I helplessly tried getting back at him but my assaults were nothing compared to his. I continued splashing water at him until I felt that he suddenly stopped.

I opened my eyes and saw him spreading his arms wide into the open sea, his hood already pulled down. He had his eyes closed as the cold summer breeze rushed through him, brushing strands of his jet black hair. The moon cast its soft glow on his face and I could clearly see the delicate features of his angelic face which is always hidden. He looked so calm and at peace with a contented smile on his face.

I did the same, opening my arms to welcome the cool breeze. It felt so good, but it didn’t last long for we heard our mother’s voice calling out to us.

“That’s enough you two! Hurry up and get changed before you catch a cold!”

It was then that I realized that I was still wearing my shirt and jeans, completely soaked. We exchanged glances and grinned sheepishly at our mom.

The rest of the evening was spent eating and talking by the fire. It has been a family tradition to spend our summers at the beach – a place we all love. We left our parents who were talking to each other to build our sand castles. Taking a look at my brother’s handiwork, I couldn’t help but feel frustrated at the lumps of sand which I call castle.

“Rin-rin,” I turned to face him and he motioned me to sit next to him. “I’ll teach you how to make a sand castle.” My frown instantly turned into a smile, which never faded as I sculpted real castles with my brother that summer night.


And just like the previous summers at the beach house, I mostly spent my mornings with my brother watching a movie or playing a board game. In the afternoon, I would take out my pencils and draw just about anything, while my brother sat in his stool, painting masterpieces in his canvas. He is the one gifted with skilled and artistic hands, which I badly wanted to have. Sadly, all my works of art are purely abstract.

I woke up this afternoon in the couch, my pencils scattered all over the floor along with crumpled pieces of paper. Rubbing my eyes, I dragged my feet towards the kitchen and called for my mom and dad but no one answered. Passing by the dining area, I noticed a piece of paper on the table. Mom and dad just went out to buy some plants which could only be found in this area. Without anything to do, I started cleaning up the mess I created in the living room. I was almost done when I noticed my brother’s painting.

I wasn't surprised to see a picture of a beach during sunset since most of his paintings included the sun. Strokes of orange and yellow hues added contrast to the blue sky that stretched to the horizon. There was great detail in the stone formations by the shore and the effect of water hitting the rocks made it look like the real thing. I was beyond amazed at my brother. For one who hasn’t seen a real sunset, his painting did capture the beach at sunset like a photograph.

“Wait a minute… where have I seen this?” I thought long and hard trying to remember and the image just flashed right before me.

I quietly went to my room, not wanting to disturb my brother in his room and grabbed my Polaroid camera. I gently closed the door and dashed into the beach. I had to move as fast as I can before it gets dark or rather, before my parents get home.

I ran the length of the shore trying to find that place in the painting. I am quite sure that I have seen those rock formations before. I have reached quite a distance when I finally saw what I was looking for. I stood on top of a rock, to somehow get the same perspective used in the painting. Aiming my camera at the right angle, I took several shots. I was so happy with my discovery that I wanted to show it to my brother as soon as possible. I could imagine the surprise in his face when he finds out I found the beach in his painting.

Satisfied with the photos, I jumped off the rock and turned back. The smile on my face as I gazed on the pictures suddenly faded, as I gaped in shock. My brother was standing a few meters behind me, smiling casually. I went on alert mode that instant and ran towards him, praying that nothing bad happens to him. Young as I was, I knew that he shouldn’t be out in the open when the sun is up. For as long as I could remember, I have never seen him outside during the day, but only at night.

“Niichan!” I cried. “What are you doing?! Go back home!”

“Nii-chan,” I panted, catching my breath. I was so worried and scared that I didn’t know when the tears started rolling down my cheek.

“Rin, it’s okay… I’m okay,” he reassured me, patting my head. “The sun’s rays are not that dangerous at this time. I’ll be fine.”

“Really?” I asked desperately trying to stop from crying.

“Really,” he affirmed, nodding his head at me. “I’m sorry. Did I scare you?” he chuckled nervously and looking apologetic at the same time.

I felt relieved to hear that but it was payback time for scaring the life out of me.

“You did!!” I wailed.

“Don’t cry… Stop crying Rin… Look, I’m alright. Nothing happened.”

He tried hard to console me but all I did was to cry even louder, making him even more flustered.

“Niichan is sorry. Niichan doesn’t want to spend the rest of his life cooped up inside his room or a building. Niichan just wants to feel what it is like… to be normal.”

I was just faking it at first, but what he said made me tear up even more. I had no idea he was feeling that way. My brother was always smiling, full of life and when it comes to me, full of tricks and jokes. He was the sun inside the house.

I then felt his warmth as he embraced me, making me feel at peace, that everything will just be fine. He was the one that needs comforting but ironically, he was the doing it for me.

We stayed in the beach until I have calmed myself down. Niichan was lying on his back while I sat next to him, staring at the horizon where the sun had finally set. He took the photos from my hand and exclaimed, “Wow! These are really great!” as he looked at them one by one.

He sat up and showed me the photos, “Look, you are really good at this. You got the right angle and perspective… just like my painting.”

“Really?” I said more than asked in monotone, clearly losing interest on the subject after what happened.

“What’s with that face?” he slightly furrowed his brows, staring at me. “I said, you are good in taking pictures. You got the eye of a photographer.”

I took the photos from his hand and sighed, “I was planning to surprise you with these, but I was the one who got the surprise.” No wonder his painting really looked similar to this place. He had seen it before or maybe even more than once before.

He chuckled once again, ruffling my hair. “When you grow up, you’ll understand.”

Wind blew through the open window, creating a blanket of paper in the floor as soon as I opened the door. Picking them up one by one, a photo caught my attention.

I chuckled holding the picture, and said, “I’m going, I'm going. I didn’t forget.”

Thousands of sunsets passed and photos taken, I stand here at the beach where my brother and I first watched the sunset together.

Looking straight at the distant horizon, I aimed my camera and waited for that exact moment when the sun disappears, leaving a burst of yellow and orange in the sky. This is my favourite time of the day as it reminds me so much of my brother.

Just like the setting of the sun, my brother’s light faded two years ago. It has been that long but it felt as if he was still standing next to me. He was born with a genetic disorder called Xeroderma pigmentosum. Exposure to UV light causes lesions in his skin, which could lead to skin or even blood cancer.

The sun which others like him feared the most is the same sun that he loved the most. He had shown it in his paintings. Back then, I never really understood what he meant by saying those words. But I think I know now.

He just showed me how to live. That summer afternoon when I found him at the beach, it was his way of trying to defy the limitations set on him by his condition. He was testing the waters. I never thought he would be that brave. My brother’s life will forever be a living testimony, that it is possible to live a life in spite of his circumstances. And risk is a choice one has to take.

I started walking back to the beach house, but took one last look back.

"Let's watch the sunset again together tomorrow, niichan."



THE END.