The Wonders Of A Girl

They say that everybody has a talent; life depends on how you use that talent, so in general what you do with it and how you use it will determine your fate. The people who claim they have no reason to be living in the world are people who gave in to life, they surrendered themselves to the hardships of life, life, what does that word mean? How do you know if you are in the right track, what would the right track be? There are so many questions that mankind has no answer to, if we were to stop every day and just think about it, we wouldn’t be enjoying our lives, we wouldn’t be able to be so carefree towards life thus causing mankind to escape from the truth. The truth is that we humans have hardly any true idea to life, we just ride the wave and see where it takes us, we basically choose happiness from unreachable knowledge, its common sense  to us humans to not strain ourselves right?

Then why does this thing we call common sense disgust me? Why does it make no sense to me? Why I am the only one who cares, who would want unreachable knowledge from happiness? Why has fate chosen a child to do what man has never thought to do? These thoughts are always running through my mind, a marathon that lives on forever. As I grow these questions grow and my hate for the human race increases and increases, and I have begun to believe that we humans are selfish, delusional, we destroy our happiness by many ways, pollution, poverty and so much more, we already destroy this thing that we treasure so much so why, why can’t we take the time to just stop and wonder about life, to just give a thought to what we are doing?  Why am I the only one who wonders these things shouldn’t I just be like the rest of the he human race and just give up! Why me a 12 year old girl having to go over mankind’s sins? Why can’t I just worry about my own life, my own desires? I guess if I try hard enough I might just be a normal girl again, but I figure if I had to choose between being an idiot or what I am now I would want this life, for I am happy that I can see things others would neglect, I am happy to be more mature then I really am, this special talent I have this thing that makes me, me it has truly given me many advantages. I’ve seen all these blind humans go past me strolling through life like a happy children ignoring all of the horrors and conflict, and let me tell you I am truly glad that I’m not them.

To be honest this special ability I have, has its disadvantages and threats, you would think that a child that would have this ability would be intelligent, a genius if you will, for that I am truly sorry, for I might as well be the greatest idiot you could ever find. My grades at school have always been averages in every subject and these days they have been getting lower and lower, I wonder why? Why is it that although i am mature enough to try and understand life, I still have the grades of an idiot! Do you know why I call myself that, it’s because I can see the right track from the wrong, I can make the best decisions ever made, but I still choose to go down that horrible road over and over again I continue to fall in life willingly, why you ask? Well I have had that question on my mind since forever, why is it that all the students in my class can go through life blind but come out winners? It’s a strange thought but it’s a true one, even if I do work hard on a subject I will always end up getting an average score, a score that is best suited for my loser friends. It seems that is not the case it seems as though my life will never change I will remain an average idiot to the world and I will still remain to have this retched curse that stands between my failure of a life, and glory. The truth is that just like my name Mitsuki, which means moon in Japanese I need to depend on someone, to shine but, in realty I don’t have the power to do anything, if it wasn’t for my lovely parents raising me right putting me in the top facilities giving me the love and care I don’t deserve, I probably would have never managed to be an average student, I would have been a horrible dense student. These are the reasons that I am grateful to my parents, it seems as though fate has chosen me to appear as an average child, while clearly being, no were near average at heart. If it was me I would rather appear to be what I really am, but life doesn’t work that way I guess all we can do is accept what has happened in the past and look forward to the future.

 The future is such a mystery to me I never can truly see what will happen next, life seems to take me by surprise, it challenges me to the fullest of my ability and then shows me that all this work that I have spent in life was useless. My world is a strange one, for you would think that if a person worked hard they would achieve something, correct? Well that might be true for others but not for me the more I work on something the more pointless it seems to me to continue and in the end, after ignoring all my common sense that something will go wrong, that its useless to continue, the results shatter me like a mirror it leaves me broken in pieces unable to think, unable to go on, unable to know what went wrong, what made my success the biggest failure of my life. As you can see my whole life is filled with questions I might never know the answer of, that it just how my life works, I work hard, thinking it would get me somewhere then end up shattered with no idea why. I would just kept wondering about life unable to actually ask a soul, for my characteristics won’t allow me to, to people’s eyes I am just an average shy girl who doesn’t work, who lets everyone take control of her, who has absolutely no confidence in herself and could do better if she tried, if she just did something to her life, if she wasn’t so normal. I’ve always heard everyone talk about me like that, it’s harsh, but that’s life nobody can really understand who you are but you. As you can already see my name is Mitsuki, I am a 12 year old girl and I question life.