Losing and Claiming

Tucking myself inside warm puffy blankets I wipe away the tears from my eyes. I am watching Dear John with my bestfriend Gemma. She sat down beside me handing me over a box of Kleenex and popcorn mixed with Maltesers.

“You feel better now?” she asked as if she’s lecturing a kid. I just nodded; my eyes still blurry from the heartfelt love John have for Savannah.

“Why can’t she wait for John? She’s so selfish.” I bitterly said knowing too well that I am on John’s side in this one. “Long distance shouldn’t be hard as long as you both love each other right?”

My friend sighed. I haven’t told her about the break up but she has enough sense to realize that I am not crying about John and Savannah and their unfortunate love in the movie. I am crying for my own unfortunate love story. She hugged me tight and as soon as I felt warmth in her arms my tears start pooling down my cheeks again.

It hurt.

It hurt a lot it crushes my spirit, kills my soul and shatters my heart.

That moment that I want to think that this is not happening and it was all just a nightmare. I quickly grabbed my pouch fumbling over to find my phone.

“Sam, Sam.. What are you doing?”

“I need to call him. I need to tell him we shouldn’t end up like John and Savannah. I don’t have anyone.” I was shaking too hard all the things I hold drop on the floor.

“Sam look at me.” Gemma demanded grasping my shoulders. “Daniel and you are over don’t call him.” She snatched away the phone and hid it from me.

“No. It’s not true. He told me He still loves me.”

“He can’t love you anymore.” She firmly said grasping my shoulders so that we can see each other eye level. “He is gone Sam. He told me himself.”

I lost all my strength and fell down the floor curling myself in a ball. I feel helpless as if my life has been taken away from me.

“Get a grip Sam.” Gemma is angry now. She made me sit down properly. “There are many fish in the sea, you can still find someone else.”

“It is him I want.”

“He doesn’t want you anymore. Live with it.”

“No. This is not happening!” I cried. I can’t remember how long I cried in front of Gemma. She was there holding me telling me words I couldn’t even understand.

__

I would stare into blankness and cry. Wallowing in the pain making sure I have enough ice cream that would make me happy. My phone rang and my heart leaps out my chest. Maybe it’s Daniel wanting me back. An unknown number appeared and with a furrowed brow I answered the mysterious call.

“Is this Samantha Taylor?” an authoritative voice of an older woman called my attention.

“Yes, This is she.”

“This is Debbie from Oaklands Resthome and I am just informing you about an interview if you are available this week.”

I wiped away the tears from my eyes straightening my seat. I screamed with excitement inside my head. I have been praying for a job these past few months since I am only working part time after the recession. The timing couldn’t be any better.

“Of course. I am in your disposal anytime.”

“Can we see you tomorrow? 1 pm.”

“Yes. Of course.”

I put the phone down and I can still feel the shivers down my spine.

“It couldn’t be.” I said silently.

As soon as the door of my heart closes an opportunity opens up. I know it is not the dream of all jobs but I have been struggling for quite sometime. I decided to work far away because the opportunity in this city s better than home. Daniel and I are saving up for our wedding.

Wedding that will never take place.

I shouldn’t have left and looked for a better job. If I only knew that this will happen I shouldn’t have done it. But it is all in the past now what I need to face head on is my new life in Oakland homes.

___

Hi guys it's been a while.  I   had this chappie for a while but I  argued  with myself about posting this. 

I guess, my subconcious won.