Alaska

Alaska
. . .

When I left the house in the morning I didn't expect to be this hungry. I knew that I would get hungry eventually but I can usually wait it out until I get home. Breakfast was not a good thing to miss, which I found out in the midst of my second period. My stomach growled loudly, almost over the teacher's lecture, earning me a few stares.

"Hey Alaska," I heard, so I turned. "How're you hungry already? I'm surprised you don't stuff your face at home!" 

Clenching my teeth, I wanted to snap back but knew I couldn't. I was feeling light headed and arguing would just add a headache to my crappy day. It didn't help that mostly everyone laughed with the exception of Mrs. Moore who had her hands on her hips.

"If you have something to say to Alaska, wait until after class. We're going over the notes for your test tomorrow and unless you want to fail ..." she droned on while I tuned her out, laying my head on my desk.

Class went on without me and nobody really cared. Mrs. Moore might've told me to pick my head up but I couldn't tell since I was probably sleeping by then. I had vocal training from six to nine and after that I went to the gym for a late workout. It wasn't a necessity but for being five foot, five inches and one hundred and thirty pounds, I put loosing weight on my to-do list. Sounds like a fullproof plan but then you have to remember that once you loose the weight you also loose the boobs.

I never thought I would be concerned about something like that before. Singing was what I wanted to do, not starring in beauty pageants. Being a bit over the norm weight for my size wasn't an issue for me once. That was up until I met Daniel, my supposed manager. The only reason I thought he hung around me was to get into my mom's pants, almost like a reverse cougar effect. Turned out that he had once worked for a talent agency before he found me, Alaska Lee.

*

Dinner had been amazing. Lunch was stupid to skip and Dad would notice for sure that I didn't use any of my lunch money on my school account. He tends to monitor that stuff to make sure I'm eating right. He tells me that I'm too light. Too bad he hasn't seen those triple digits on the scale. He'd think otherwise then.

"How was school?" he asked, browsing through the mail, tossing away the junk that we didn't need. "Did your friends all have a good Halloween?"

I nodded briefly, making sure that it was a brisk action so that I could clean my plate and go into my bedroom. Days that went by without someone poking fun at me or questioning what I do would be considered a good day but I seldom found those to occur. I had heard before that other people may feel the same as I feel but that would be impossible. They aren't me. They don't know how I feel. They don't know anything of what it's like to be Alaska Lee.